Cave Mode'
by TooMuchCaffine
Summary: An insight into the world of men, no offense if you are one. If you've ever had trouble understanding the opposite sex, this fic is for you! Based loosly off 'Men are from Mars Women are from Venus'.


AN: Trying something a bit different today. This is more of an analytical fic, and my first try at something like this, so feedback would be greatly appreciated!

* * *

"Gibbs?" Ziva prompted, "Are you alright."

He'd been sitting at his desk for nearly an hour now, not really doing anything. Just stoically waiting, for what she couldn't tell. Ziva could read most men like a book, except when they acted like this. From time to time, they would become a wall, completely oblivious to the world around them. All men do it subconsciously. Consciously, it makes perfect sense to them to sit and brood for a while.

"I'm fine," he insisted, continuing to stare blankly at the wall across from him, "It's nothing, really."

"Of course it is something, if it were not, then you would not be upset, yes?" she rambled, "Did I say something wrong? Are you angry with someone? Tell me!" Ziva could read most men like a book except when they acted like this, and would become a wall, completely oblivious to the world around them. All men do it, though subconsciously.

"Ziva, it's really not a big deal," he assured her, "I just need some time to think."

"About what?" when she received no answer, she sighed, "Fine. You are not going to tell me..."

* * *

"Ducky!" Ziva marched down to Autopsy, frustrated beyond the telling of it, "He is doing it again!"

Ducky sighed, wondering what she was referring to. Depending on what and whom she was talking about, it could be just about anything. "You'll have to be a bit more specific. I am not a mind reader."

"It's Gibbs." she told him, knowing that that statement alone would tell Ducky pretty much all he needed to know.

"Ah," he smiled, "That narrows it down quite a bit, but considering that he's known for his quirks, enlighten me." he poured her a cup of tea and gestured for her to sit, "What is he doing that has you so exasperated."

"That's just it," she explained, "He's not doing anything."

"Gibbs is in cave mode?" Tony asked, poking his head in from around the corner, "Wow...that's something not even you could prepare yourself for, Zee-Vah!" he shook his head sadly.

"I'm sorry, 'cave mode'?" she stared at Tony strangely, "You're a man, explain this 'cave mode' to me."

Ducky chuckled warmly, "It's a sort of phase that men go through periodically, or in Jethro's case, constantly. When frustrated, worried, angry, or in deep thought, rather than women who tend to vent their emotions, men will often go into a 'cave', so to speak, and withdraw there for a while pensively until they come up with a solution."

"And this is normal?" Ziva looked at the two men who nodded, not seeing her point, "He has been sitting there over an hour, staring at the wall!"

"Yeah, and...?" Tony prompted

"Unbelievable," Ziva rolled her eyes, "Alright. How does one get a man to come out of this...cave?"

Tony and Ducky exchanged glances and answered in unison, "You don't."

"Fortunately, there is only one entrance and exit to the 'cave'," Ducky explained, "Once he goes in, he must come out. However camping out at the mouth of the cave will only make him wearier about leaving it."

"It's nothing personal," Tony assured her

"It's only a phase, remember?" Ducky smiled

"And whatever you do, you do not invade a man's cave," Tony cautioned, "Wow...that sounded kind of wrong..."

"I concur completely," Ducky nodded, ignoring Tony's snide remark "In one Native American tribe, young women are told about this 'cave' when they get ready to marry. It is just a man's way of thinking. They are also told that there is a dragon guarding the entrance to the cave, and if you try to enter it, you will get burned. If you try to invade the sanctity of the cave, it will only lead to conflict."

"I see...so can one be burned by their own dragon?" Ziva asked, finally starting to see how this worked.

"Normally, no, but with Jethro, anything is possible."

* * *

"Abby!" Ziva called over the loud music, "Gibbs is in his cave!"

"Aw, man!" Abby groaned, turning the music down, "Any idea why? No, of course not, no one ever does. What's the big deal?"

"You know about this?" she asked, surprised, "Why did you not warn me about this?"

"I thought you knew!" Abby stated as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Ever read _Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus_?" she asked, finding the book on her shelf.

"What? Both are from Earth, yes?" Ziva flipped through the pages. "Humans cannot live on other planets."

Abby rolled her eyes, "It's just a way of saying they're different." she moved to her computer, accessing the feed from the security camera in the bullpen. "Yep. Full on cave mode."

Gibbs was still sitting, staring at the cubicle wall. He hadn't moved an inch in hours. No twitching from the caffeine that flooded his bloodstream, no getting up to use the head. He did this so frequently, how had she never noticed before?

"How long does this usually last?" Ziva sighed, "He has been sitting there for hours!"

"Depends," Abby shrugged, "After Kate died, it lasted a few weeks. Oh, that reminds me!" she picked up the phone, "Director? It's Abby...Just a heads up, Gibbs is in his cave...yeah, again...I hope so..." she smiled, having successfully gotten the warning out. "Anyway, Ziva, if you try to figure out what's going on inside Gibbs' head, you'll probably go crazy."

* * *

Ziva sat at her desk, occasionally peeking over the cubicle walls to see if Gibbs had snapped out of it yet. Unfortunately, it seemed like he wasn't going to leave the cave any time soon.

She finally decided to drop it. He would snap out of it eventually, or at least that is what everyone told her. She turned off her computer, and grabbed her bags. As she walked toward the elevator, Gibbs caught up with her, "Hello, Gibbs!" she smiled, trying to pretend she hadn't noticed anything different, "Going somewhere?" her fingers hovered over the buttons, waiting for him to tell her where he was going.

Gibbs reached out, hitting the button for the second floor, where the cafeteria was located, "I need coffee."


End file.
